THIRD STAR
Alex Rockoff of the Gremlins
Gremlins have long been yellow (going as far back as the days of Unicorns), but never before has it presented a problem with bees. This week rookie sensation, Alex Rockoff, forgot his beekeepers equipment and got stung by a bee mid-game. Now while this would send most of you (okay, us) running for the hills or the ER. It didn't stop him a bit. The kid continued to play the entire game with a stinger in his arm. He sure was dedicated to making a good impression on his new team, or he just likes sports. Who knows? Way to go all Stacy Kehoe by displaying your toughness and grace, Alex. Welcome to BTSH.
SECOND STAR
Sam the Drunk Ref
Everyone's favorite drunk ref came up with an amazing drunk idea...guess what? It's actually a good idea. Turns out, like many of his drunk ideas, it wasn't even his idea. The second star this week goes to the De-escalation Card. If you were around for any of the three games Sam Norris reffed, you might have seen him pull a green card. No, Olivier, it doesn't mean you get citizenship. It means y'all need to calm the F down.
De-escalation Card! Rule number one, son.
Gut Rot, BITCHES!
Guys, can you guess who got the first star this week?! Was it Instant Karma? Math? The TSP Hawk? Nope. You all guessed wrong. It's GUT ROT, dummieeeeeeees! Every week, the other 18 teams (other than the actual opponents), stand on the sidelines, beers in hand, cheering on the league darlings, Gut Rot. Then every week, we drop a tear in our beer for our beloved Gut Rot. NOT THIS WEEK. You think they were celebrating Pride in the West Village any louder than we were celebrating this victory? Probably not. Hillary was there? Whatever, we had Tommy Cho. T. Cho for President!!!
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